Who is this? DODGERS shortstop Rafael Furcal.
What is this? An autograph card from 2001 Topps, card number GAA-RF.
Where'd I get it? Probably an auction.
How much did it cost? Too much.
Why is this not so special? RAFAEL FURCAL IS A FINK.
Take yer stupid hurt back and yer stupid agents and your stupid DUIs and go back to LA ya bum! Kelly Johnson's a better second baseman anyway! Yunel Escobar's a WAY better shortstop! You better hope you're back on the DL on July 31st when you come back to Turner Field or you'll hear a chorus of drunk rednecks booing lustily! BOOOOOOOOOO! You're dead to me Fookie! No, wait. I have sympathy for the dead. I have respect. I HAVE NONE OF THAT FOR YOU. you, you, turncoat... backstabber... dasher of hopes and dreams... you.... you...
YOU ARE J.D. DREW TO ME.
Whew! I feel better now.